Ever feel that you’re being moved as a pawn in the games others are playing around you? .
As one federal executive expressed it, “You've got to be aware of the games that are being played. You don't have to play the games yourself, but you do need to recognize when they are being played against you.”
There are games we play for fun, or for learning, or just to pass the time . . . and everyone knows that they are games. Games like baseball, chess, soccer, bridge, tennis. But then there are the other kinds of games—secret, covert games that are played (usually on the job), not for fun, but for keeps. Secret games that the opposing players don’t tell us are under way, nor what the rules are, nor even what “winning” consists of.
The fact is that games and mind games, probes, ploys, manipulations, “strategic disinformation” (i.e. lies), and operating through stand-ins, are inescapable realities in today’s working world.
You may not want to play the games. But you do need to spot them, and to focus your efforts accordingly.
Smart Questions for Playing the Games of Business and Life guides you in finding solid answers to questions like,
- What is “winning” for me, and for the others?
- What’s really going on here–a real issue, or a subtle test? Am I being given the recognition and compensation I (honestly) deserve; if not, why not, and what can I do about it?
- What are the “real rules” that operate here, beneath the coded language and disinformation?
- What’s my best move at this point: is a confrontation needed; is now the best time?
- Do I really need to be involved in this: if yes, is now the best time?
- What should I consider before taking action; am I thinking enough steps ahead?
- Are there broader opportunities hidden within this situation?
- What’s my best move, here and now, toward accomplishing my overall objective?
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COMING SOON:
Knowledge is power . . . particularly in today’s organizations, where your effectiveness will depend in large part on your ability to collect information, and to discern what’s really going on around you.
But getting the truth can be difficult. You can ask questions, yet find that sometimes people don’t want to level with you, perhaps because they’re afraid the truth will put them in a bad light, or because they’re trying to be “nice,” and tell you what they think you want to hear, rather than what really is.
At that point, you could confront head-on and demand the truth. But that’s often not the most productive way of getting to the real truth. They may become defensive and hence less inclined to be open. Or the question itself may give away what you’re really looking for . . . and hence tell them what to conceal or “spin.”
Mental Pickpocketing: How to Ask Questions Without Seeming to Ask
Mental Pickpocketing flowed from my work as a lawyer and management consultant. In both professions, I often found it necessary to approach from an unexpected angle in order to get the truth. As a lawyer, I found some clients shaded the truth, even though I was working on their behalf. As a consultant, I was by the nature of things an outsider, and often people in client organizations felt threatened by my presence, even though I was there only to collect information for a project that had nothing to do with them, apart from the information they held.
Mental Pickpocketing can work both ways: it’s important to recognize when you are the target of mental pickpocketing by others. Hence the book provides both the how-to use mental pickpocketing techniques, as well as antidotes for dealing with (neutralizing) them if you sense them being used on you.